Same, Same but Different - Dogs vs Men

In a previous blog post, I compared cats with peri-menopausal women.  It's only fair that I now point the finger at dogs and men.  For those overly-sensitive males out there, please don't take it to heart, it's just a bit of fun, even if it really is almost 100% true.





FARTING

Any list that starts with farting is a good list in my book.  I dare you to find me a man that isn't completely enchanted and beguiled by his own farts.  They seem to be so extraordinarily proud of what is a normal bodily function.  They have no shame.  And neither do dogs.  As an owner of two extra-large canines (plus a husband), our living room can get quite hazy with the fog of farts and flatulence that emit from the male orifices.  It can be quite noxious.  Anyone that has big dogs know that not only do their farts smell, they are loud.  Sometimes there is a cacophony of cheek-flappers assaulting my ears in the evening.  Men are also very proud of their loud flatulence, and usually give you a sly look to ensure that you noticed.  We notice men, we notice.

HUMPING

Dogs will hump almost anything - other dogs, cats, human legs.  Men won't hump anything, but.....

THREATENED BY THEIR OWN KIND

Dogs will approach a new dog with caution, making sure that the new dog is not a threat and won't upset their place in the world.  Men approach other men in the same way, circling each other like dogs but without the bum sniffing.  Thankfully, men, like dogs, usually make friends easily and all the posturing comes to nothing.

TERRITORIAL MARKING

Why is it that men get such a kick out of peeing everywhere but the toilet.  'Because they can' is the most appropriate reply (and as a female, yes, I do get a bit jealous of that).  Dogs love to mark out their territory with the cock of a leg and a squirt of urine, full of informative data for other dogs.  When we  have other dogs come to stay, it becomes a great game to pee over top of the other dog's pee, and it becomes this endless circle of  urination.  Same goes for a man peeing in the yard - the dogs, particularly Manu, cannot wait to pee in the same spot.

IF YOU GIVE THEM ATTENTION, THEY WILL FOLLOW YOU ANYWHERE

It doesn't take much - some subtle eye contact, a smile and a gentle touch and they are yours.

BOTH HAVE TO BE TRAINED

When you first get a puppy or a man, they are very excitable and burst with enthusiasm, but really don't know how to behave properly or what is socially acceptable behaviour.  With lots of work, love, encouragement and positive reinforcement, both can be trained. Up to a point.

FASCINATION WITH CROTCHES

I don't think I need to elaborate on this one.

At the end of the day, we couldn't live without either of these lovely creatures, could we?