Friday Follies - Straight to the Moon!

I was driving to work this week when I heard about Elon Musk's latest endeavour - sending one of his cars, complete with spaceman mannequin, into space. Not only is it in space, they say it can possibly be orbiting between Earth and Mars for thousands of years. It's true!  In fact, they estimate that if all goes well and it doesn't blow up first, it could be in space for several hundred million years.  Unfortunately, it has not gone quite as planned. It overshot its trajectory and may last less than a year due to asteroids and radiation.  Still....good effort!!

Lift off!

Personally,I think someone has WAY too much disposable income, but hey, no one can say that he doesn't dream big....or creatively!  And he has facilitated a lot of scientific advances.

As I drove like on auto-pilot, my mind wandered when I heard this story.  And it wandered to a placed that wondered.  And it wondered, "What would I like to send into space for several hundred million years."

Here is my small, but not complete list. (Disclaimer - this list does not include obvious things like pestilence and poverty, abusers and killers.  Those things are no-brainers.)

Artists rendition of my thighs

1  My thighs.  Let's be honest - they aren't great.  They never were.  My family genetics destined it to be so.  They are sturdy and keep my bum off the ground, as Grandma used to say, but they ain't pretty.  They wobble where they shouldn't, and although dimples are cute on little cherubs of babies, they aren't cute on my lower appendages.  I would like to send those jiggly suckers up into space.  Let's not think this through too much though, because if I got rid of them, I'd have to walk on my bum, which would mean that my nose would be at everyone's bum height.  No thank you.

My acquaintances

2  Peri-menopause.  It can fly off into space.  Good riddance, I say.  And take your hot flashes, sleeplessness, anxiety and mood changes with you.  As for what you are doing to my body, see point #1.

Pardon the language

3  Slow walkers in the grocery store.  Hello people, the point is to get in and get out, not stand in the middle of the aisles with your trolley having a conversation with someone in person or on your phone.  Move over, get out of the way and let me by.  I try and be polite and stand there patiently, hoping you will see me, then I utter a quiet 'excuse me', hoping that you will acknowledge that you make a better wall than a door.  Please don't look annoyed when I finally start pushing past with a more firm 'Excuse Me' escaping my lips.  See point #2 for my tolerance levels.

It's them

4  Loud Chewers, Pen Clickers and Finger Tappers.  All of you are firing up my misophonia and I don't like it.

It's so much nicer than the one-finger wave.

5  People who don't wave a 'thank you' when you let them in while driving.  I was just doing something nice and courteous.  Don't be so rude.  People who don't say 'thank you' when you hold a door open for you are in the same category.

6  One-Uppers.  Those people that can take any subject that you, your friend or your work colleague is talking about and 'one-up' it.  They have done everything first, or better, or more often, or crazier.  Even if they haven't done something, they find a way to turn it around to them.  Well guess what, if you go off into space on Elon Musk's rocket and orbit for several hundred million years, you can one-up everyone on Planet Earth. 

7  Complainers.  They are in the same box as the one-uppers as far as I'm concerned.  Always complaining and moaning about something.  Positivity does not come naturally to them and they drag everyone else down with their constant negative comments and judgements.  Life isn't that bad or horrible, I'm not sure how moaning about everything makes you feel better.  Complain about the never-ending journey of your orbit in space please.

8  My need to have things in even or logical numbers.  It will kill me to not have a list of 10 things, so I'm going to put 8.  Who on earth writes a 'Top 8' list.  Well, I do.  It is killing me though. When this goes up into space, it better make an even number of orbits or be able to be divided by 5.

Clearly, we will need a very big spaceship to put all of these things into space.  They will at least be in interesting company - click here to see some truly strange things that have been sent into space.

None of this matters though because nothing can be cooler than a red, sporty car with a spaceman actually rocketing through space.

It is actually really cool