Friday Follies - You Don't Send Me Flowers

Last week the sad news was announced that Neil Diamond has Parkinson's Disease.  Oddly enough, we were listening to some old Neil songs that weekend, enhance by my melodious rendition of 'Sweet Caroline'.  'Enhanced' may be generous, but what I lack in talent, I make up for in volume.  Enhanced volume.

One Neil Diamond song that I always remember from my childhood is the duet with Barbra Streisand, "You Don't Bring Me Flowers".  Why do I remember it so well, you ask?  Well, that was the song that my Mum used to blast on repeat when she was mad at my Dad - for example if he was late home after work (and not for work reasons!).  The music got louder and louder as time went on, and true to our family tradition, what she lacked in talent she made up for in volume. See, I come by it honestly.  I think it's genetic.

A classic

Another tactic that Mum used to take when Dad was late for dinner was to slightly adjust the food as time went by.  She didn't do anything really nasty, like spitting in it (as far as I know!), but she did, very deliberately, add a bit more chilli powder or cayenne pepper as the hours ticked by.  If the first mouthful of dinner exploded my father's head, he knew that he was in it, and deep.  Of course, the loud velvety voices of Neil and Barbra should have tipped him off when he walked in the door.  No one said that men are quick at picking up on subtleties.

 

Whoops, sorry honey!

I had regaled Shawn with these stories from my parents' marriage (as well as the good ones - I'm equal opportunity) when we first started dating.  They must have sunk in, because if I happen to make dinner a bit too spicy by accident, Shawn asks what he's done and why I'm mad at him.  Silly man, I wouldn't use the same tactics as my mother - women are more devious than that.  And the first rule of being a husband is that you've always done something wrong.  You just don't know about it yet.

And no, I won't reveal my secrets.  They are secrets for a reason.

We plan, and we keep our secrets.

All couples fight, argue, disagree and want to kill each other at various (and sometimes frequent)points in their relationship.  You need to have conflict to grow, it is more important how you fight and how you resolve things than the fact that you fight.  And accept that maybe sometimes you are the one in the wrong.  As with any couple, we've grown a lot over time and have learned better ways to manage our disagreements.....usually.  Sometimes we are both still petulant teenagers, feeling wronged by the world and self-righteously believing that we are not part of the problem in any way.

The thing that really, really gets up my nose is the way that Shawn has learned to 'manage' me.  I don't mean this in a bad way.  But when I have steam coming out of my ears and a throat-punch is imminent, the bugger makes me laugh.  Geez, thanks for diffusing the situation, I was enjoying my anger. How annoying.



Fortunately I have learned how to 'manage' him as well.  I always know when he's lying (which is usually about camping or 4WD purchases...not really anything very juicy) and when he's trying to pull the wool over my eyes.  That really annoys him as I call him out before he knows it.  It's all in the eyes, you see.

What?
I'm telling you the truth, I haven't been to the camping store.

So while Sweet Caroline doesn't Send Me Flowers, I will be Forever in Blue Jeans, watching Cracklin' Rosie be a Kentucky Woman while singing Song Sung Blue on a Hot August Night - it's all a Groovy Kind of Love with Mr. Bojangles.

The legend.