Wine Not?

Believe it or not, they are now making wine for cats and dogs.  I know...crazy or brilliant??  I think it was invented more for the humans - you're not drinking alone if you are pets are joining in, are you?

The Pinot Meow and CharDOGnay apparently have a similar effect on our pets as wine has on us - they become more relaxed and a bit goofy.  The cat wine uses catnip to this effect - have a look at this video to see some of the side effects.  I'll admit it, I'm a bit intrigued to see if it would work on Clawde and Purrkins.  They are not interested in catnip at all, unlike my previous cats who went crazy for it, but still, I'd like to give a try.

Slurp, slurp, slurp

I can imagine sitting down after a long day at work, enjoying a nice glass of wine while my loyal pets sit next to me, slurping down their beverages.  No actually, I can't imagine that, but there must be a market for it.  Probably the same market that buys fancy beds and outfits for their pets.  My dogs like to lie in dirt holes and roll in poop.....I don't think they are sophisticated enough to enjoy a special drop and my cats are no more up-market than the dogs.

Clawde and Purrkins

This brought me to my next vision that I had in that I had in that middle state between wakefulness and sleep.  You know, the time when weird thoughts invade you brain and become elusive as the morning approaches.

So...what would it be like if my pets enjoyed a glass or two of their special wine?


One too many?

Clawde would be like the high school girl drunk on a gallon of cheap, sweet wine I think.  His love for everyone would increase with the amount he drank.

"Hey, dude, how's it going?" Purrkins approaches Clawde as he sits at the bar, casually slouched into the stool, his fur slightly dishevelled.  And yes, Purrkins would be the type of cat to say 'dude'.

"Pretty good thanks.  Pull up a seat.  Bartender - one for my fine friend here, please" (Clawde would definitely say 'please').  As Purrkins settles his furry derriere into the chair with a flick of his tail, the bartender pours a glass for him and tops up Clawde's wine.

Clawde puts a paw around Purrkins, looking into his eyes. "I've been meaning to tell you something.  I love you man.  No, don't shake your head.  I really, really love you."  Tears well up in his eyes.

With that statement, Purrkins handles the outpouring of affection in the way that he always does, by promptly body tackling Clawde to the ground while biting his neck. 

Yup, that's how it would happen.  I always knew that Purrkins wouldn't be able to handle his alcohol.

Manu would be much the same as Clawde.  Full of love and affection for everyone.  I would hope that it would also calm his nerves a bit and make him more chilled out.  But let's face it, he'd be a mess - drool slipping out of his mouth, and his doodle making an unwelcome appearance.

 

I have tried, but I can't even imagine what Chamois would be like with some wine under her skin.   Crazy, bitchy, mellow....or a combination of all three?  She gets pretty dreamy when she is given one of her 'happy' pills for thunderstorms - the equivalent of our Xanax - so hopefully she would be the same way on wine.  But who knows - she may be a crier.  Or...gasp!....a slut!

Definitely one too many....

So would I purchase some of these drinks for my pets?  Probably not.

It's too risky.  What if they all turn out to be angry drunks and they end up killing me and eating my face?